As my mantra in business is, ‘Successful business relies on successful relationships’, I have been musing and exploring, what makes a great relationship.
All relationships start with YOU.
Take responsibility for you.
Do the work on you.
Own your own stuff.
Deal with your own stuff and your lineage of stuff passed down.
Your partner (relationship person) works on their stuff.
They own their stuff.
They deal with their own stuff and the lineage of stuff passed down.
There is no comparison or competition. There’s just an understanding that we are on different journeys together.
There is no blame.
There is no, ‘you need to do this or that for me’.
There IS an underlying connection and flow of trust, respect and love, nourishing both.
Understanding and acts of service naturally and intuitively unfold.
Partnered autonomy gifts personal space. Intimate personal space to explore, sort out and clear yourself individually for further realisations, self-actualisation and growth.
Love is offering space. Love is offering understanding. Love is saying, ‘I am here’. I can listen, discuss and explore your thoughts, feelings and ideas with you.
Love is cheering from the sidelines, giving the high fives, asking the explorative questions.
Love is helping to mirror and shine a light on, but not in an ‘I know it all’ way, or in a ‘I know how to fix it’ way. Because you don’t.
Your partner is on their own journey, using their own perspectives and filters to navigate their way.
Let them. Empower them. Let them know you believe in them to help themselves.
Don’t disempower them by taking over. That is arrogant.
We are on our own journey, so our intentions for others may not be the purest until we have done our own work, until our subconscious is purified.
We also need to be careful with rescuing. From a spiritual perspective, by taking over, by taking on other people’s problems, we can also take on their karma.
When we jump in to rescue, we fill up this self-exploration space, we clutter it, we become a distraction, we disrupt the natural flow. Learnings and self-realisations become that much harder and take that much longer for them. Give space, give grace and send love.
This is when we can get into the flow as a relationship. We can get into the slip-stream of partnered self-realisation and achieve so much more for ourselves, with each other.
It takes courage to let go and trust, and that courage is true love. The root of the word courage is cor – the latin word for heart.
The heart is the transformation point. The heart is where, when we live our values, we engender trust and respect and create a loving, expansive environment for others to freely grow and flourish.
Integrate your truth
Cath Sutherland is the Director of Conscious Business – helping businesses to understand who they are, so they can do business better. Cath facilitates teams and leaders through her unique Creating Brand Energy process to develop, through collective consensus, their unique Conscious Business Blueprint – a clear, multi-level guide to manage, direct and develop relationships, operations, and product delivery. Cath can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org