Inspired by Michael Singers’ book The Surrender Experiment, I made my word for 2022 Surrender.
I also took a year off to see what the flow of life would present. What I ended up doing this year, was not what I had planned or thought I would do.
Just recently a ‘friend of a friend’ taught me how to surrender on another level and gave me an epiphany for life.
I grew up the youngest of six kids. So, you can imagine that if I wanted something, I really had to want it. I had five older, bigger and stronger siblings who were making sure their needs and wants were met first. So, when I wanted something, I really had to hold on to that intention with as much energy as I could, for as long as I could, to have some hope of achieving it. I created a clear focus on what I wanted and then created a strong energetic force field around it. I learnt to wrap my intention in my determined will. I believed anything is possible if you want it passionately enough and work for it hard enough. I don’t believe this now. Yes, we are creators of our own lives with our thoughts, words and actions, but also, what will be, will be.
Understanding Newton’s Third Law of Physics, to every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, my laser focussed intentional forcefield pushing out, was invoking an equal force of energy to come the other way. The effort of holding my focus and intention and holding off the reactional opposite energy was draining me.
From my recent experience I had an intention for my friend which was being undermined by her friend. In my head, I was thinking, ‘that’s fine, that’s cool, it doesn’t matter what her friend is saying or doing, because we are going to make sure this happens anyway. Just let the energy and pressure from this person go.’ But what I actually did was put up my emotional energetic force field to bolster and protect my intention. A learned subconscious action.
After this experience, I was emotionally and energetically drained.
Then I realised why. My intention was too forced. I hadn’t set my intention and then surrendered to the possibility. I had forced that intention with all of my energetic will. Which only resulted in me creating an energetic standoff with myself. This had nothing to do with the friend of my friend, it was all to do with me. I had created this.
Then I thought, ‘do I do this in other areas of my life?’ And I realised, ‘yes, all the time.’ If there is one issue I deal with weekly it is feeling drained of energy. I live my life this way, setting intentions and then muscling them to manifest.
What I realised was that the energy tug of war I thought I was having with my friends’ friend, was really with myself. I did it, I drained myself, I created such a strong intentional forcefield that the effort of this drained me. She had nothing to do with it.
I could have set the intention with the feeling of joy and then surrendered to the possibility, letting her undermining behaviour simply dissolve.
Not set the intention with the focus that this is damn well going to happen NO MATTER WHAT!
Why did I do this? Because I wasn’t confident in myself, I needed an excuse (that I was battling this person) to justify my actions. I needed the self-worth to relax into the knowing that I could enjoy my friend and do what I wanted to do and easily say ‘no’ to my friends’ friend, without the forcefield.
With this consciousness, I am choosing to set my intentions with a higher frequency emotion of joy, love and excitement and to drop the childhood strategy of the forcefield.
In 2023 I am going to take my surrender to the next level and see what presents.
What are you holding on to too tightly? Are you forcing or muscling your intentions?
Have you truly surrendered? Can you surrender more deeply in 2023?
I’d love to hear your thoughts
Integrate your truth
Cath Sutherland is the Director of Conscious Business – helping businesses to understand who they are, so they can do business better. Cath facilitates teams and leaders through her unique Creating Brand Energy process to develop, through collective consensus, their unique Conscious Business Blueprint – a clear, multi-level guide to manage, direct and develop relationships, operations, and product delivery. Cath can be reached at email@example.com